When I had my own business I used to cook the books, but one day the taxman broke his teeth on one. I stuck to cooking eggs after that, because it was such an egg-spensive do. I had to shell out a lot of money it certainly wasn’t a poultry (paltry) amount, it was no yoke. Al Bumen my taxman, was no feather weight, I payed him up straight away though, after all it’s no good being chicken about these things, but it made a big hole in my nest egg.

Am I being dippy, or do I win a cup?

I know, that was all a bit silly, but it’s a change, from moaning about things.

Eggs

On toast, with soldiers, chips or bac,on , If you’re wanting eggs then I’m the one. I always like to add a bit of shell, If you’re lucky a feather as well.

Eggs with soldiers that’s quite fun, but first I have to take away their gun.. Toast with eggs I have learnt, well you know, it’s much better burnt.

If you’re having chips, you don’t want the silicon type, just like brioche it’s all just hype. Maybe I could cook you egg of goose, from which mother you could choose.

Duck eggs are good it’s always said, or they may hit you on the head. Fabergé eggs now theirs a thing, but I prefer my diamonds on a ring.

Scrambling eggs is quite insane, I can’t get them to their plane. I once cooked eggs Benedict, but someone said it made them sick.

For being sick I think the reason, Benedick Arnold’s act of treason. I think he was a rotten egg, if not that, then the truth I beg.

All words Meadowhead Bard.