I haven’t grown this year, I’ve shrunk! I lost weight after My cancer then five year or so later put it back on whilst in hospital and recovering from burns. I got back down to 11.5 st just before we came away, so now I’m enjoying putting a little back on.

A good old favourite from the archive today

DIET OF MADNESS

I’m going on diet, I’m going to lose some weight,
I’ll start by avoiding all the things I hate.
Things like salad, broccoli and sprouts,
I know it will work, I don’t have any doubts.

Think of all the weigh I’ll lose, if I just eat the things I love.
If I only eat the nice things and none of the above,
I’ll just just have cakes, sausages, chips and pies,
If I don’t lose weight like this, it will be a big surprise.

I had two weeks of this regime, and it must be said.
I haven’t lost any weight, I’ve put pounds on instead,
I get on the scales in the morning, I get on the scales at night,
But the weight it just piles on and on, this just can’t be right.

I’ve now swapped it all around, and only eat the things I hate.
All the horrid green stuff, piled upon my plate,
I find it all so bland, so tasteless and depressing,
I even put weight on from a bit of salad dressing.

If I don’t lose these inches soon what can I eat on hols?
No Ice cream, no fish and chips, no greasy old spag bols
I’ll be glad when it’s all over, and the excess it is all gone,
By then it will be Christmas, and it will then all go back on.

All words Meadowhead Bard.